(This
is the key third chapter of my thesis on missional
mentoring)
Three Key Areas of Mentoring
Introduction
This chapter focuses on three of the most important issues in mentoring
within the church. The analysis of the specific research and contemporary
literature highlight significant weaknesses in mentoring models and practice.
The first area of importance to be looked at will be the place of mission in
mentoring. The second issue discussed is one many authors have highlighted; the
need for mentors to set a good example and its biblical basis. The last area of
examination is the assumption made by the vast majority of authors that
mentoring should be done individually rather than in groups despite the example
of Jesus and the apostle Paul.
The Central Importance of Mission in Mentoring
It is surprisingly difficult to find books on mentoring from an
evangelical perspective that give central importance to mission. This point is
illustrated by three popular Christian mentoring books currently in print[1] Mentoring by Walter Wright, Mentoring Matters by Rick Lewis, and
Reverse Mentoring by Earl Creps. Rick Lewis
is a church consultant with recognised expertise and experience in the area of
mentoring and his book is probably one of the best in the field of popular
books on the subject. It is insightful and rightly emphasises the pivotal role
of the Holy Spirit in mentoring. He specifically sees mentoring in terms of
discipleship and also clearly views mentoring as vital in helping leaders
respond to the urgent challenge of mission. Lewis gives the following
definition of mentoring, “Within intentional, empowering, unique relationships,
Christian mentoring identifies and promotes the work of God’s Spirit in other’s
lives, assisting them to access God’s resources for their growth and strength
in spirituality, character and ministry.”[2] Lewis here and in his general approach gives
attention to the supportive and proactive role of the mentor and says more
about mission than some. However, he fails to address the need for mentors to
model and intentionally develop mentees in the area of missionary outlook and
effectiveness. Rick Lewis speaks of the importance of purposeful, focused and
intentional mentoring but speaks in general terms of the need for growth in
spirituality, character and ministry.
Lewis is one of a number who rightly link the terms mentoring and
discipleship closely.[3] However Lewis
and others perhaps fail to see discipleship as essentially missional at its
core.
Discipleship as we shall see in the section on personal example is
about imitating God. If ‘God is a
missionary God’[4] then the
disciple needs to reflect that element of his nature. The Bible narrative
illustrates from the very beginning how God, even when humankind rebelled
against him, continued to pursue close relationship with those he had created.
In Genesis chapter twelve we see that God chose Abraham in view of the eventual
blessing of the nations. He chose Israel to be a light to the nations for their
salvation (Is 49:6) and sent his son to live on earth to show his love, [5] his glory[6] and draw all[7] people to
himself.
During his life on earth Jesus helped his disciples develop a heart for
mission and sent them to do mission while they were still young in their faith.
Alexander Bruce in his careful and thorough examination of Jesus training
methods indicates as much,
He inculcated on His disciples a large-hearted generous concern for the
spiritual well-being of men. To foster such a spirit He sent the twelve on this
trial mission [Matt 10] even when they were comparatively unfitted for the
work, and notwithstanding the risk of spiritual harm to which it exposed them.
At all hazards He would have His apostles be filled with enthusiasm for the
advancement of the kingdom...”[8]
Indeed Bruce rightly sees Jesus training of the disciples as about
preparing them to be messengers (apostles) to their own people and the wider
world.
Some think of mission primarily in terms of evangelism but many
theologians rightly see mission in more holistic terms. In recent scholarly
studies discipleship is viewed in terms of holistic mission. One important
example is Richard Longenecker who speaks of discipleship as presented in
Luke’s gospel as prophetic proclamation centred on Jesus[9] and of concern
for the poor and marginalised.[10] Jesus clearly
identifies himself as responding to the needs of the poor and oppressed (Lk
4:18) and defended those who exorcised demons in his name even when they were
not part of the recognised group of disciples (Lk 9:49). Jesus taught that his
followers would be rewarded for feeding the hungry, caring for the sick and
visiting prisoners and clothing the naked (Mat. 25:31-45). In the same passage
he emphasised this point by condemning those who fail to help others in
practical ways. What is also significant about this parable is that Jesus identifies himself with the needy. Jesus
encourages mission, not only in his name, but also to be done, in a sense to him.
A recent series of church focused seminars given jointly by the Sophia
Network, Urban Saints and CPAS on mentoring is illustrative of the same
weaknesses found in much contemporary literature on mentoring. These weaknesses
include the lack of importance given to mission, the mentee focused approach to
mentoring, and the failure to see discipleship in terms of self denial and self
sacrifice.
In the workbook used alongside a one day teaching seminar they quote a
definition of mentoring which speaks of a mentor helping a mentee “...in their
life and service of God’s kingdom purposes”.[11] This
clearly gives importance to mission. But the implications of this are not
elaborated on later in the workbook (or in the seminar). In the workbook there
are twenty questions suggested for use when mentoring youth. However none of
the twenty questions relate to mission in any way.[12] The teaching
presents a goal orientated model and specifically says goals should be personal
and set by the mentee.[13] The danger with this is that it may be
illustrative of mentee rather than Christ-centred mentoring despite it being
said that the aim of mentoring is “...for the mentee to be the best they can be
for God”. [14]
The workbook speaks of the importance of meeting with a purpose and
refers to Carson Pue’s approach[15] based on
increasing self-awareness and a process of discovering and then implementing
God’s “call” on a person’s life. Increasing self-awareness and responding
positively to God’s call on one’s life are no doubt important and helpful to
many. However there is a danger with an approach which focuses strongly on a
person’s gifts and skill set and calling.
People may be discouraged from sacrificial service in areas where they
are not ‘gifted’, where self fulfilment takes too high a priority.
There is a focus on spiritual growth at the end of the workbook but
apart from a reference to bearing fruit from John 15:5 the emphasis is on
developing a closer relationship with God through spiritual disciplines but not
on interaction with the wider world. In short mission is hardly referred to and
could easily be overlooked which during the day-long seminar attended[16] certainly was
the case. This is a great shame as mentoring has a potentially more dynamic
role in forming and inspiring believers to authentically live out their
missionary calling.
Many church leaders in the UK would agree that missional discipleship
is weak in their churches. The prevalent “convert and retain” strategy compares
unfavourably with Jesus’ “train and release” strategy.[17] Indeed there has
been an over reliance on the schooling model of training disciples in contrast
to the more biblical model of learning through nurturing relationships. Sylvia
Collinson draws attention to this in her seminal monograph on making disciples.[18] Missional
mentoring is clearly part of the answer to this, particularly if it encourages
believers to live the kind of “Gospel infused lives”[19] they are called
to. The alternative to a missional approach is an insular one as Collinson
indicates,
An inward looking faith community concerned only with its own growth or
teaching will not be as effective in promoting learning as one which seeks to
fulfil Jesus’ commission to participate in his mission in the world. There is
something in the outward orientation which brings to those involved greater
opportunity and motivation to change. Reflection on such activities with
persons having more experience [mentors?] will further enhance development.[20]
What is clear from most books and articles on mentoring both secular
and otherwise is that mentoring relationships have a potentially important
supportive, pastoral role. A mentor is not primarily a counsellor but there are
clearly times in mentoring where the situation of a mentee is such that the
priority should be to give support to the mentee. This does not mean that the
mentoring relationship cannot at the same time be centred on developing a
missionary disciple. But it does mean that efforts should be made to keep a
mentoring relationship both God-centred and missional in the sense of being
outward looking and outward going. “Mentors serve others best when they encourage them
to lift their sights from their own agendas to seek after God’s agenda.”[21] Jesus’ example is illustrative. He lived his whole
life with the clear purpose of accomplishing his Father’s will (Jn 5:19). He
was continually in touch with the Father and saw that to train his disciples
and prepare them for mission was a very important part of his work.
One further vital element of missional mentoring that needs to remain
in focus is the scriptural principle of passing on to others what has been
received,[22] especially
in terms of teaching. The disciples of Jesus spent a great deal of time
receiving teaching from Jesus before he commanded them to teach others to obey all the commands he had given them (Mt
28:20). Ideally mentoring should have the same focus. “Once mentoring has been
received, it is easier to provide it for others. Where a mentoree takes on the
role of serving another future leader, the benefit they have received through
being mentored is more firmly established in their own life...There is a great
need for mentoring to be multiplied as a normal function of Christian community
and missional leadership in our time.”[23]
The Importance of Personal Example in Mentoring
According to Genesis God created human beings in his own image (1:27)
and he always intended humanity to give him glory by resembling his own good
qualities. Throughout the Bible we are commanded to emulate or imitate God[24] or aspects of
his character. In Ephesians Paul writes “Imitate God, therefore, in everything
you do, because you are his dear children. Live a life filled with love,
following the example of Christ. He loved us and offered himself as a sacrifice
for us, a pleasing aroma to God.”(5:1)[25] In Jesus
and in the Apostle Paul, we see men who lived conscious of the need to be a
model or example to those they were seeking to help grow. Jesus specifically
asked many people to follow him (Mk 1:17, 2:13, Jn 1:43) and set an example for
his disciples to emulate (Jn 13:14-15). The apostle Paul on numerous occasions
specifically drew attention to his own example (Acts 20:18-20 and 34-35, 1 Cor
4:15-16, 1 Cor 11:1, Phil 3:17, 4:9, 1 Thess 1:6-7, 2 Thess 3:7-9, 2 Tim 1:13,
2:2 and 3:17,). He also encouraged others to set a good example particularly
those he mentored (1 Thess 1:7, 1 Tim 4:12 and Tit 2:7).
When the concept of imitation or being a model is discussed it is
important to get to the heart of what is intended. If we examine Paul’s
injunctions to follow his example what did he actually mean? There are a number of possible answers to
this question depending on the particular passages of scripture examined and
how these are interpreted. This study is indebted to Victor Copan’s thorough
analysis of the concept of the imitation of Paul, including his careful
exegesis of relevant passages. Copan indicates that Paul’s roles as a leader, a
teacher and a spiritual parent were roles in which imitation was normally found
in Greek and Jewish contexts of his day so his injunctions in this regard are
to be expected. However what is surprising is that Paul, despite his authority
as an apostle, also presents himself as a brother emphasising his equality with
his readers. Paul is, in effect saying, you can follow me by not claiming too
much for yourself. For example in 1 Thessalonians 1:1 Paul does not use any
title and as Copan says, “In the context immediately preceding the reference to
imitation in 1 Thess 1:4, he addresses the recipients as “brothers,” as he also
does in other imitation contexts (Phil 3:17; 4:8 and 1 Cor 4:6).”[26] Paul then is
consciously modelling humility as Jesus himself did (John 13). This is also
seen in Paul’s speech to the Ephesian elders where he speaks of his own humility,
“You know that from the day I set foot in the province of Asia until now I have
done the Lord’s work humbly and with tears.”[27] Paul then goes
on to tell them to remember the way he has lived, “Remember that for three
years I never stopped warning each of you night and day with tears.”[28] He again draws
attention to his example at the end of his speech “I have never coveted
anyone’s silver or gold or fine clothes. You know that these hands of mine have
worked to supply my own needs and even the needs of those who were with
me. And I have been a constant example
of how you can help those in need by working hard.”[29] This quality of humility is modelled in
relation to Paul’s service of Christ. He speaks of himself as a steward and
servant of Christ and the Gospel (1 Cor 4:1) explicitly encouraging his readers
to take on the same humble attitude.[30]
According to Copan, Paul’s missional or global/holistic[31] modelling is
clear from references to imitation in Thessalonians, Corinthians and
Philippians and as we have seen also from Acts 20.[32] In 1 Thessalonians
1:6 Paul says the Thessalonians “...became imitators of us[33] and of the
Lord”, and clearly commends their imitation which he says has resulted in his
readers becoming an example to all believers in Macedonia and Achaia. This
passage indicates that Paul set an example by the way he and his companions
lived, “You know how we lived among you for your sake.” (v5, NIV) Paul then is
writing of the Thessalonian believers imitating his lifestyle and message. A message
which Copan says should be, “...holistically understood to integrate both the
embodiment of truth lived out before them as well as the verbal communication
of truth”[34]
Some may suggest a much narrower interpretation of the meaning of
imitation in 1 Thessalonians 1:6 referring to how the Thessalonians received
the message (with joy despite difficulties) but even with this interpretation
Paul is simply highlighting one example of many of how they were imitating him.
A further point particularly relevant to personal mentoring is the fact
that Paul only invited those churches he planted to imitate him.[35] His call to
imitation was therefore a specific call based on relationship and concrete
personal example. What kind of example is illustrated in his call to imitation
in Philippians 3:17? Gerald Hawthorne writes “Here ...Paul calls on his
Philippian ‘brothers and sisters’ to emulate in their lives what they have seen
in his own life and in the lives of Timothy and Epaphroditus – that is, in
their self-denying, their self-giving actions, their willingness to suffer in
order to help, and their risking all for the sake of Christ and others.”[36] These qualities
of Paul and his fellow workers are evident particularly in the context of
shared mission with the Philippian Christians (Php 1:5, 27, 30).
In conclusion then the apostle Paul calls people who knew him
personally to follow him as he followed the example of Jesus. This is seen
specifically in his servant attitude, his self denying and in his tireless
Christ-centred work for the salvation and growth of others.
Servanthood ...was something that Jesus exemplified, something that
Paul, in turn modeled, and something that we, as well, are called to emulate.
Because the goal is not only the good of others but their salvation, setting
aside one’s rights to serve others becomes not merely desirable but required
for a disciple. In a society like ours that prides itself on personal rights
and freedoms...this exemplar is much needed.[37]
The apostle Peter too speaks of discipleship in terms of humble service,[38] “So humble
yourselves under the mighty hand of God, and when it is time, he will lift you
up” (1 Pet 5:5-6).” James likewise illustrated the need for humility (Jas
4:6-7). As mentors then we are called to serve our mentees humbly and model
servanthood and self denial as we serve the world.
A strong emphasis on setting an example does have certain inherent
dangers. Setting an example should not be about the reproduction of the mentor
in a mentee. As Rick Lewis says,
First, there is a minority idea in circulation, yet still persistent,
that mentoring is about reproducing themselves – their talent, skills knowledge
and even style – in another person. This is a horrible idea. Attempts to
recreate others in our image, or shape them to accomplish goals that are ours
not theirs, is the business of people consumed with delusions of self
importance.[39]
Perhaps a bigger danger, in relation to being an example as a mentor,
is that the mentor fails to be the kind of good example he or she aspires to. A
mentor may carry a sense of failure in this regard. It is clear no one can come
up to Jesus’ standards and most struggle to be half the disciple Paul was. If a
mentor purposefully models, as part of their mentoring, there is a danger that
they may actually set a poor, even detrimental example in the way they live and
perhaps the way they minister. This is a serious concern; however it is still
better to live openly before a mentee so that she or he sees the faults and
failures of the mentor. All people are examples, whether good or bad, in
different areas of their lives, mentors should seek to be honest with their
mentees about their failures because even their failures can be of help to
their mentees. These failures or weaknesses can encourage mentees as they see
that a person they may regard as more mature struggles as they do.
Mentoring Individually or in Groups?
There is little doubt that according to the Gospel record Jesus did
what we are describing as mentoring nearly always in a group rather than
individually. Even the apostle Paul as we saw earlier who is often cited as an
example of someone who mentored individuals in fact probably mentored in groups
more often than one to one. The crucial question is, to what extent it is
appropriate to follow the pattern of Jesus who was an itinerant rabbi in first
century Palestine in regard to this method of mentoring? Jesus spent a large
amount of time with his disciples living together over the best part of three
years. They had the freedom to spend a lot of time together. For a time, they
left their jobs and appeared to have less immediate family responsibilities (in
terms of spending time with wives and children) than many disciples have
today. A similar style of intensive,
communal living may be impractical and even inappropriate in many areas of the
world today. However this dissimilarity between cultures does not exclude the
validity of group mentoring.
One important element of the relationship Jesus had with his disciples
clearly should not be replicated in mentoring relationships today. Namely, the
position Jesus took as master or Lord with regard to his disciples. A mentor
should not seek this kind of relationship with a mentee as their role is rather
to point to Jesus as their own master who is the key person in their
relationship.
It needs to be recognized that group mentoring would be more demanding
on the mentor than individual mentoring due to the necessity of addressing the
needs of the group as well as that of each individual. It may be very difficult
to mentor several people at once in a group setting if they are at
significantly different levels of maturity. Moreover, in a group there would be
greater potential for conflict which may be difficult to handle but this is
also a potential benefit, as group members then have the opportunity to see how
conflict can be productively handled.
The vast majority of writers on the subject of mentoring assume one to
one relationships without even discussing alternatives. One exception is Regi Campbell in Mentor like Jesus where he claims not to
have found one article or book about mentoring from a group perspective.[40] Campbell is
surely overstating his case, Gunter Krallmann’s book on mentoring certainly
gives repeated importance to mentoring from a group perspective.[41] Krallmann
says of Jesus, “He gave preference to a team setting which brought advantageous
group dynamics into play.”[42] There are also very many books and articles
which speak of the importance of discipleship from a group perspective.[43] It is
unfortunate that many see mentoring as always being one on one, whereas many
acknowledge discipleship is best done in small groups.
Campbell, Krallmann and others are surely right to draw attention to
the importance of Jesus’ group mentoring of the disciples but this does not
preclude the possibility that mentoring may be helpfully done individually as
well as in groups. Indeed it may be seen as preferable for mentoring to be done
in small groups where possible but one to one mentoring in the context of a
healthy Christian community is not only valid but has the potential to be
extremely helpful. One significant
advantage of group mentoring is that if each member of the group takes
responsibility to help others grow this would guard against an over reliance on
the mentor and help each mentee take a more dynamic role than might otherwise
be the case. Martin Sanders who has extensive experience in discipleship
training sees small group discipleship as “...far more effective”[44] than one to one.
He suggests group discipleship actually saves times compared with one to one
discipleship.[45]
The other major advantage of group mentoring is that, when correctly
handled, it can help guard against an individualistic way of thinking. As Crow
reminds us, the mentality of the first disciples may have been quite different
from our own.
Given their group-oriented culture plus
their group experience under Jesus' tutelage, the Eleven would not have
heard Jesus' command as "make [individual] disciples who make [individual]
disciples who make [individual] disciples." They would have
heard this command with a group orientation: "make [groups
of] disciples who will make [groups of] disciples who will make [groups
of] disciples.[46]
Perhaps the biggest drawback of one to one mentoring is that the
community aspect of discipleship could be neglected. Indeed, individual
mentoring relationships may even be divorced from local church life altogether.
This would be a denial of the importance of the faith community so vital to
authentic discipleship. As Sylvia Collinson points out, “All believers are
God’s family and are called together as a nurturing discipling community in
which all members are engaged in cooperative lifelong learning.”[47]
Conclusion
There are significant weaknesses with prevalent models of mentoring in
the church today. In response to these there is a vital need for the importance
of mission to be a core value in mentoring. The development of the mentee in
effective outreach needs to be a central goal of the mentoring relationship.
Mentoring is often best done in groups though it is recognised that this is not
always practical and would be more demanding for a mentor than individual
mentoring. However mentoring is organized, the need for the mentor to set a
good example, particularly in serving the mentee, in self-denial and in humble
service in the world, is of central importance to truly biblical discipleship.
[1]
The following books came up on a search of Eden Christian Bookshop for books on
the subject of mentoring http://www.eden.co.uk/ accessed 23/5/2011
[2] Lewis,
Mentoring Matters, p 20
[3] “From
a biblical perspective, discipleship is a lifelong process of following Christ
in which a person is transformed...to be like him in thinking, character and
action. Facilitating this process is closely akin to ...mentoring.” Lewis, Mentoring Matters, p 36
[4] Bosch,
D. J., Witness to the World (Atlanta:
John Knox Press, 1980) p 239
[5] Jn
3:16
[6] Jn
1:14
[7] Jn
12:32
[8] Bruce, A. B., The Training of the Twelve (New York:
Cosimo Inc., 2007) -Originally published by T & T Clark (Edinburgh: 1889) p
109
[9] “Discipleship
is to be involved in prophetic proclamation, with that proclamation focused on
the work of Jesus.”Longenecker,
R. N., ‘Taking Up the Cross Daily: Luke-Acts’ in Longenecker (ed.) Patterns of Discipleship in the New
Testament p 75
[10] “Discipleship
is to be concerned for the poor, the imprisoned, the blind, and the oppressed.”
Ibid
[11] Mentoring to Transform Lives seminar
notes undated but given out in November 2010 and produced by Sophia Network,
Sheffield p 6, the full quote is said to
come from Arrow Leadership Programme –no further details given
[12] Mentoring to Transform Lives workbook
undated but given out in November 2010 and produced by Sophia Network,
Sheffield p 21
[13]
Ibid p 17
[14] Mentoring to Transform Lives seminar
took place in Stockton on 2/10/2010. One of the leaders Paul Wilcox said this
during the seminar
[15] Pue, Mentoring Leaders
[16]
Ibid
[17] Green,
Let My People Grow, p 15
[18] Collinson,
Making Disciples
[19] Jan
McCuin sees the end goal of whole-life disciple making “...to equip Christians to live full,
integrated, Gospel-infused lives wherever God places them and whatever
challenges this brings.” McCuin, J., ‘Experiments in Twenty-First
–Century Disciple-Making’ in Green, Let My People
Grow, p226
[20]
Ibid
p 246
[22]
Gen 18:19, Mat 28:18-20, Lk 12:48, 2 Tim 2:2,
[24]
Dt 33:1, 1 Kgs 17:24 use of the term “man of God” to describe those who showed
God like characteristics, see also Lev 11:44, Mal 2:15 and 1 Pet 1:16
[25]
NLT
[26] Copan, Saint
Paul as Spiritual Director, p 221
[27] Acts 20: 18-19
[29] Acts 20: 33-35 (NLT)
[30] Eph 4:2, Phil 2:3, Col 3:12
[31] Copan, Saint Paul as Spiritual Director, p 223
[32]
Verses 18-19 & 35
[33]
The “us” here presumably refers to Paul, Silas and Timothy mentioned in the
greeting in verse 1.
[34] Copan, Saint Paul as Spiritual Director, p 104
[35] “Interestingly, Paul calls only
those churches he has personally founded to imitate him – that is, the churches
of Galatia, Philippi, Thessalonica, and Corinth. Where he modelled a life of
discipleship, there he can expect imitation.” Belleville, L. L., ‘Imitate
Me, Just as I Imitate Christ: 1-2
Corinthians’ in Longenecker (ed.), Patterns of Discipleship in the New
Testament, p 121
[36]
In Hawthorne, G. F., “The Imitation of Christ: Philippians” in Longenecker (ed.) Patterns
of Discipleship in the New Testament, p 177
[37]
Belleville, L. L., ‘Imitate Me, Just as I Imitate Christ: 1-2 Corinthians’ in
Longenecker (ed.), Patterns of
Discipleship in the New Testament, p 126
[38]
Michaels J. R., ‘Going to Heaven with Jesus: 1 Peter’ in Longenecker (ed.), Patterns of Discipleship in the New Testament, p 267
[39] Lewis,
Mentoring Matters, p 31
[40] Campbell, J. R.,
Mentor Like Jesus (Nashville: B &
H Publishing, 2009) p 39
[41]
See also Sanders, M., The Power of
Mentoring (Camp Hill: Wing Spread Publishers, 2004)
[42] Krallmann,
Mentoring For Mission, p 211
[43] Such as Oak, J. H.,
Called To Awaken the Laity (Ross-shire: Christian Focus Publications,
2004), Collinson Making Disciples, Greg Ogden, Transforming Discipleship:
Making Disciples a Few at a Time (Downers Grove: IVP, 2003), Bruce, The
Training of The Twelve , Robert E. Coleman, The Master Plan of
Evangelism (Grand Rapids: Revell, 2008).
[44]
Sanders, The Power of Mentoring p 74
[45]
Ibid p 75
[46] Crow, D. M., ‘Multiplying Jesus Mentors - Designing
a Reproducible Mentoring System A Case Study’ Missiology: An International Review, Vol. XXXVI, no. 1, January p
90
[47] Collinson,
Making Disciples, p 245
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